With the Excelsiors called back to Eataine to repel a recent Dark Elf invasion, Head Coach Endycarus signed a temporary contract to coach an obscure collection of Skaven and Goblins called Grudge Match. They played their first match against upcoming Lizardman team Pax Britannia last night. We had the rare opportunity to listen in on the coach's side of a long distance communication with Excelsiors quarterback Kolrith.
"I'm sorry to hear that. That's got to be quite a blow."
"Well, obviously it pales in comparison to defense of the homeland. Anyways, I don't really want to talk about it."
"Ha. No, it's not that they're uncoachable; it's more like they're allergic to the ball."
"Actually, the casualty count was better than your game against the Incredibles last season."
"Yes, of course I realize the difference between an experienced Orc team and a bunch of rookie Lizardmen. I'm just saying..."
"Yeah, I know. It seems like every troll the Excelsiors have ever played against was a genius. Retribution did nothing but drool for most of the game. The stormvermin are good, though. Well, were good, in the case of the dearly departed Vengeance."
"Threw an amazing hit, then tripped over his tail trying to get to another skink. Took a pretty serious concussion, just like you did last season, but he could have had plenty more productive years with the right treatment."
"No, there was no 'setback'. The damned apothecary killed him. On purpose."
"I can't prove it, but I heard him grumbling about all the 'work' it takes to keep a Skaven in game condition once he's had his bell rung once. Next thing I know, there's a smell of cooking coming from the locker room and he walks out with a bowl of some kind of rat soup."
"Yeah, I hope you give those Corsairs the boot quickly. I don't think I can get through two seasons of this."