Playoff

Elvz are tha Best of tha Worst

The Elvz from tha Hood went all the way in the Underbowl for a full triple-header.

The first match was against Jihad and there was a lot of inducment cash to bring them in.  At game time, we found out that they had found a Mysterious Old Medicine Man to shore-up their team.  Those humans tried, and they ran around the field generally being a nuissance, but in the end, the Elf steroid program was just too much and we got a solid 4-1 victory.

The second match was against the Hydra Lords, the classic battle of High Elf passing game versus the Dark Elf trickery and running game.  The Hydra Lords came with a whole stack of dirty-tricks stuffed up their sleves.  The Elvz used their most succesful strategy: get luckier than the other team.  Well, it was a nasty battle.  The Elvz pounded the Hydra Lords and by the end of the match, most of the Dark Elves could be found either in the first-aid tent or the penalty box.  It was another solid 4-1 victory for the High Elvs.

With all that time on the pitch in one day, many of the Elvz were really getting the hang of some of the new tricks that they've been practicing.  John von Bomb finally learned to kick the ball *on the pitch*, Gnarly George was going for it without falling over, Clif Crasher was side-stepping around opposing players and on top of all that, Wild Bill was starting to leap over opposing players to bring his bull-strength full-bore on the ball carrier *and* Johnny, famous Johnny who's been holding the front line for two full seasons also joined the Elvz 'roid program beefing up like Sick Sid, Wild Bill, and Hideous Hugh before him.

So we were ready for anything. And "anything" in the Underbowl final was the Moonlight Embrace.   Moonlight Embrace, well, I don't remember what the heck induced them to the pitch, but whatever it was, it was fueled by a violent rage.  They smashed, and they bashed, and the blew the Elvz down.  Johnny suffered a broken jaw, Tom tha Bomb was badly hurt, Jittery Jim a serious concussion, and Sick Sid who had already smashed his left hip against the Darkland Warriors got his right hip smashed.  He'll never move faster than a Zombie again...

If there's one thing Nuffle loves, it's the blood of hard-fighting teams so Elvz purchased victory with gallons of their blood.  It was a long hard grind to a 2-0 shut-out to take the Underbowl victory!

We won!   And it's time to break-out the golf clubs... Or catheters for the likes of Sick Sid.

Happy golfing , everyone!

- Arch

Punch-Drunk Prizefighters drown Annoying Goofs in a river of their own crocodile tears

Fans of the Punch-Drunk Prizefighters have been getting drunk and punching each other in the face late into the night, celebrating the teams first win in the playoff qualification round, a 3-2 thriller against the Annoying Goofs.

It must be noted that the lizardmen have lodged a complaint with league officials, alleging that the Punch-Drunk Prizefighters paid a chaos sorceror to draw down torrential rains starting directly before kickoff, and evaporating precisely before the amateur strip-a-thon half-time show.  Lord Chaos was quoted saying the following about the weather: "It was fuggin' black magic!  Those mutha-forkers know that lizardmen get sleepy in the cold rain...  But it was a damn sunny day before and after our offensive half!  We've been robbed!  We've been cheated!  Although it's not all bad.  At least I won 100,000 gold by betting against the Goofs."  The Punch-Drunk Prizefighters have not made an official comment, but the team accountant was serreptitiously recorded during a team celebration at the local brothel, saying that the elves could not control the weather, and they made damn sure that no one could trace the payments to the guy who could.

The first half was a complete mud-bowl.  Torrential rain nearly flooded the stands and definitely affected the lizard running game as they fumbled the ball over and over again despite their rerolls.  Abandoning the forward line, elves swarmed into the back field to pressure the ball carrier.  Despite backfield blitzes by angry Saurus that stunned the catchers over and over, the elf blitzers were finally able to isolate the ball and bust "Puny" Pacquiao free to run it in.  The Annoying Goofs could not buy a break all half with the exception of an early casualty against a line-elf, caused by the stabbing skills of their rented star Hemlock, and KOing Guida "Tha Cheetah", who would fake unconciousness all game to remain safely in the dugout and start his drinking early.  The second PDP touchdown of the half was similar to the first, due to the inability of the lizards to hand off the ball with any reliability.  Eventually the superior agility of "Pretzel" Penn overcame the environmental factors and the desperate tackles of the saurus' guarding the ball to run in for a 2-0 score.

The start of the second half, with the weather clearing up, had the lizards pull out their dirty trick.  With "One Arm" Armstrong isolated in the elf backfield with the ball, he stumbled into a trampoline trap!  Sent flying into the waiting arms of a saurus, he still managed to land on his feet and put the elf passing skills on display as he ducked away from his marker, sprinted around the far side of the formation and tossed a pin-point pass into the middle of the ruck.  "Puny" Pacquiao once again busted loose of the encroaching tackles around him and got the third score on turn 2 of the second half.

By this point, casualties were mounting and the elves were getting outnumbered on the pitch.  When asked why the apothecary was not on hand to tend to the injured, coach Subhedgehog explained:  "WALK IT OFF, WEAKLINGS!  Those 'injured' players are pussies.  They were faking it because they knew were going to win.  Besides, the doc was busy recruiting a new assistant coach/masseuse and a cheerleader/masseuse in his private office.  He said he wanted to see them show off their baby-oil skills.  On each other.  The team's new employees better be smoking hot or I'm going to murder an unnamed apothecary."

With the lack of rain and the burning shame of a 3-0 scoreline urging them on, the lizards put together a good scoring drive quickly and managed to get organized enough to blitz their mid-field kick directly after!  The outnumbered elves couldn't stop the co-ordinated attack and gave up another touchdown.  The two quick TDs left the game at 3-2 with a couple of phases remaining.  The Punch-Drunk Prizefighters brought the ball deep into their end after the kick, taunting the lizardmen as the scaly bastards rushed forward into scoring position and drooled at the ball.  Squinting because of the blazing sun, "Pretzel" Penn rushed up and tossed a pass deep to "Puny" Pacquiao.  Pacquiao was not out of danger however, as he was the elf-meat in a scaly-leather sandwhich, surrounded by angry future boots and handbags.  Despite a crashing blitz and block after block, Pacquiao hung on to the ball to secure the win.

It started off as a what seemed like a lop-sided game, but by the end it was a nail-biter.  The Goofs had a bit of a long shot to score on their turn 8, but it wasn't impossible.  Fortunately for the Punch-Drunk Prizefighters, the Goofs couldn't get it done and PDP walk away with a berth in the quarter-finals.

League Playoffs and Postseason

Championship Tournament Structure:

As mentioned above, there are three different finals tournaments a coach can possibly play in. Due to the numbers of coaches in either league changing from season to season, the number of coaches able to participate in any given tournament may change. With the exception of the Underbowl, attendance in the Finals Tournaments is mandatory if you qualify, and a coach may only compete in one of the 3 tournaments.

The Thunderbowl Championship Tournament is an 8-16 man, 3-4 round KO style tournament to determine the overall winner of the B League. 'The Thundercup' or 'Thunderbowl'  has the same rewards as The Blood Bowl, see page 33 of the LRB5.

The Powerbowl Tournament is an 8-16 man, 3-4 round KO style tournament to determine the overall winner of the C-League. The Powerbowl holds the same rewards as The Chaos Cup tournament, see page 32 of the LRB5.

The Underbowl Tournament is open to any coach who fails to qualify for their respective leagues' finals tournament. Like the other two tournaments it is KO style. Since it is an optional tournament, the number of coaches competing and rounds played changes from season to season. The final match of The Underbowl holds the same rewards as The Spike! Magazine Trophy tournament, see page 32 of the LRB5.

In all semi final and final matches, the Gate and Winnings are doubled. (That is, your total earnings would be equal to ((D6 + Fame Bonus) * 2) + Win/Tie Bonus - Spiraling Expenses).  In addition, the winners of the Thunderbowl, Powerbowl, and the Underbowl final both receive a Trophy Re-roll at no cost, although it counts towards their team rating as if it were a normal team re-roll. At the end of the next seasons' championship tournaments, the trophy re-rolls are 'passed on' to the new champions and removed from the previous winners' rosters. Otherwise, trophy re-rolls work exactly like Team Re-rolls.

Challenger Circuit:

The Thunderbowl Challenger Circuit is played bi-yearly on the Cup Day year end championship Game Days only in January and July. The games are not mere exhibition games - they carry the awards and permanent blood like any other official sponsored TB League match. There is no schedule in the Challenger Series - find another opponent that fits the criteria below and you are ready to rock. The Challenger Series is open to all current Thunderbowl members and alumni alike under the following conditions:

1. The coach has been knocked out of the Thunderbowl, Powerbowl or Underbowl play-offs. Under these conditions the player may choose to enter any team that has played in the BC-League at one time or another and can currently be found on TBSN.

2. The coach is still in the play-offs, has a bye-round with his present team, and is entering a team in the Challenger Series that is not currently participating in the TBL play-offs, in other words a retired team the bye-round coach owns.

3. The coach is an alumni player and has come out to play other alumni player in the Challenger Series with former TBL franchises owned by the respective coaches; or has come to play a current Thunderbowl member that has been knocked out of the play-offs where either coach can pick whatever TBSN franchise they own; or they play a current Thunderbowl member who is in a bye-round but is entering a retired team in the Challenger series.

4. No make-up Games. The Challenger Series is only endorsed by the TBL during Cup Day.
5. No coach may play more than 4 Games in the same day. If this means that the coach played 2 Play-off games before being eliminated they could only play 2 Challenger Series games.

6. Provided none of the coach's teams violate any of the legalities above, a coach can play up to 4 different teams in the Challenger Circuit if they wish. A coach is not bound to one team - they may play their current team once it's knocked out of play-offs in one Challenger match, then a formerly retired team they own, then switch back or whatever if they like.

7. The Challenger Circuit is voluntary - meaning both coaches have to agree to play each other, and they also have to agree to what teams they will choose beforehand. No coach needs to accept a challenge, and no coach will ever be penalized for doing so in any way shape or form. A coach may also skip a round of the Challenger Circuit only to play in the next round with the match and the team he really wanted to play. It's a live official round of legal cherry picking.

8. No two teams can play each other twice in one day, nor 2 coaches play each 2 Challenger games - although they could play 1 play-off and one Challenger series against each other albeit completely different teams.

The Challenger Series rolls for money, experience, MVPS, Fan Factor, Gate and permanent injuries like any other official TBL game. Full inducements like Star Players, Cards, Babes, Wizards and the like are also in full use like any other game.

Post Season:

After completion of a Thunderbowl season, coaches may either:

a. Keep their current team and remain in the B-League if they began there at the beginning of the Thunderbowl season.
b. Keep their current team and move from the rookie C-League if they began there at the beginning of the Thunderbowl season, and move to the veteran B-League for next season.
c. Drop their current team into moratorium which can be resurrected at the beginning of any future Thunderbowl season, and enter the C-League with a new TV100 team.

 

Season 21 complete

The 6th year of the BC League, Thunderbowl's 21st consecutive season is now complete. All the Round of 12 matches and byes are now decided.

First Overall: C-League: Power Slaves - Necromantic at 8-0-2 140 Lps; Coach: John M. Good job Johnny. You seem akin to Undead teams. 

Most Casualties: B-League: Heathens of Blood Bowl - Undead - 51 Cas; Coach: Tony. That's a new league record by 10, and a record that probably will never be broken in 10 games. You are a bastard reds.

Most Touchdowns: C-League: Nottingham Forest Falcons - High Elves - 28 TDs Coach: Simon. You still need a bunch to go before you break the Lords record for most touchdowns in a season, but good show Simon.

Most Casualties Against: C-League: Empty Threat - Halflings - 36 Cas Against; Coach: Lee. Ouch. No wonder you're going back to Chaos next season.

B-League had 2 teams that had 8 wins this season, C-League had 4.

The top 4 in each division and round of 12 match-ups are as follows:

B-League:

Top Four:
01. Heathens of Blood Bowl: Undead. HC: Tony. 8-1-1 LPs: 135 +/-: +15
02. Chaotic Chicklets: Chaos. HC: Ryan G. 8-1-1 LPs: 135 +/-: +12
03. Steel Dragons: Dwarf. HC: Craig. 6-1-3: LPs: 125. +/-: +9
04. Short and the Restless: Dwarf. HC: Murray. 6-1-3 LPs: 125. +/-: +6

B-League Round of 12:

#5: Elvs From tha Hood - High Elves (Dominic) vs. #12: Rotten Corps - Nurgle (Darryl)

#6: Moonlight Embrace - Necromantic (Sean) vs. #11: Dead Menace - Necromantic (Bob)

#7: Rabies Rush - Skaven (Jing) vs. #10: Rat Bastards - Skaven (Geoff)

#8: Annoying Goofs - Lizardmen (Tyler) vs. #9: Punchdrunk Prizefighters - Pro Elf (Paul)

C-League:

Top Four:
01. Power Slaves: Necromantic. HC: John M. 8-0-2 LPs: 140 +/-: +19
02. Nottingham Forest Falcons: High Elves. HC: Simon. 8-1-1 LPs: 135 +/-: +19
03. Drakonian Vipers: Lizardmen. HC: Mike M. 8-1-1: LPs: 135. +/-: +18
04. Beastiality: Chaos Pact. HC: Kavin. 8-1-1 LPs: 135. +/-: +13

C-League Round of 12:

#5: Kontract Killaz - Orcs (Jesse) vs. #13: Rocky Mountain Derangers - Chaos Dwarf (Gord)

#6: Jundheim Icelords - Chaos (MacPhee) vs. #12: Ram Chargers - Chaos (Kevin)

#8: Carrion Crawlers - Skaven (Jason W) vs. #11: Frengard Foxes - Human (Kristian)

#9: Something Wicked This Way Comes  - Necromantic (Dave) vs. #10: Empty Threat - Halflings (Lee)

Okay guys. One Round of 12 game decided. 7 more to go. Lets get it on. 

And thanks to all for a pretty care free season. 3 Yellow cards handed out in total. Out of 36 coaches that's not bad at all.

B League Speculations

As there are 3 games still left to be played, there are more than a few possibilities.

One: Tyler bt. Tony, Murray ties Ryan G, Ryan S bt. Dylan

#1: Ryan G; #2 Murray; #3 Tony; #4 Craig. Tyler goes #6th over Sean as Tyler won h2h. Sean goes #7th, Jing goes #8th. All other seeds remain unchanged. Ryan S and Dylan's result only matter for Underbowl.

Two: Tyler bt. Tony, Murray bt. Ryan G

#1: Murray; #2: Tony; #3: Ryan G; #4: Craig. Tyler goes #6th over Sean as Tyler won h2h. Sean goes 7th, Jing goes #8th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

Three: Tyler bt. Tony, Ryan G bt. Murray

#1. Ryan G; #2: Tony; #3: Craig; #4: Murray. Tyler goes #6th over Sean as Tyler won h2h. Sean goes 7th, Jing goes #8th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

Four: Tony ties Tyler, Murray ties Ryan G

#1: Tony; #2: Ryan G; #3: Murray; #4: Craig. Tyler goes #8th. Sean goes 6th. Jing goes #7th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

Five: Tony bt. Tyler, Murray ties Ryan G

#1: Tony; #2: Ryan G; #3: Murray; #4: Craig. Tyler goes #8th. Sean goes #6th. Jing goes 7th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

Six: Tony bt. Tyler; Murray bt. Ryan G

#1: Tony; #2: Murray; #3: Ryan G; #4: Craig. Tyler goes 8th. Sean goes 6th. Jing goes 7th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

 Seven: Tony bt. Tyler, Ryan G bt. Murray

#1: Tony; #2: Ryan G; #3: Craig; #4: Murray. Tyler goes 8th. Sean goes 6th. Jing goes 7th. All other seeds remain unchanged.

 

I'm hoping for Scenario three, with Tyler bt. Tony, and Ryan G bt. Murray. This puts Tyler in #6th vs. #11 Bob. Ryan G bt. Murray would put me in #3 over Murray in the standings. Go Lizzies and Chaos!!